mood: tired
location: room
now playin':You'll Be okay - Varsity
It's easy to say everything's fine. But what are the chances that they really are? I've fallen, gotten up, got pushed back down on the ground and got back up. But the pain of falling with all the bruises remains.
The problem with me? I sway, fall and falter too easily.
Most of the time, I think before I sleep. I think and get sucked into deep thoughts. I think of what my life would be if I hadn't moved to the North side, but remained at the East. What are the chances of meeting the people I know now?
And then I wonder what life would be if I didn't put on so much weight. What it would be like if i was still that P6 girl who weighs only 31kg and whose skin is so fair.
Wonder what life would be if people wouldn't have such mouths that were so light to scream the word "FAT" at everyone who wasn't as skinny as a pair of chopsticks and were just merely chubby.
Why is this world so materialistic? This world is cruel. This world is materialistic. This world counts more on whats on the outside than the inside.
Now i understand why people go on strict diets and end up depressed, at the asylum, or worse, DEAD. Because this world is so cruel. They force people to seek means and ways to lose that extra fats just to be one to "them". And if they fail in losing weight, they're condemned for life. Or at least till they day they lose that weight.
And then there's those idiotic people who are already as skinny as toothpick that whines, "OMG! I AM SO FAT!" And then they turn aneroxic, bulimic or just eat a tomato that is to last them a whole day. What the hell? It's an insult to the rest of us who are on the chubbier side. You think about it. If you're fat/obese, what the fuck does that make us? You're already like a toothpick, how thin do you wanna be? Prolly all bones left then you'll be satisfied? Stop being so vain. You need a brand new pair of eyes.
Why is this world never satisfied? You are given an inch, you want a mile. You are given a mile, you want a yard. Why? Why are we humans so materialistic, so vain, so mean, so evil, so unsatisfied?
And then there's that bunch of morons that condemn people for being short. -.- Short is wrong, Tall is wrong. Tall people which they were taller and they look down on short people. Short people look down on themselves for being short and wished they were taller.
And it's worse when people who dont know you or dont like you just love to poke their oversized noses into your life. They comment on the slightest thing you do. How short you are, how tall you are, how thin you are, how fat you are, how long your hair is, how short you dress is, what clothes you should and shouldnt wear. If it bothers you mentally deranged people out there so much about how others are, then dont look at them, dont find out about their lives, dont comment on how they should or should live their lives and just shut the fuck up and stuff the comment up your arse if it refuses to go back down your throat. Because at the end of the day, it's their lives and if it is ruined based on what you fags have to say, you will end up feeling the guilt on top of having all that sins amounting on your shoulders.
One day, we're all gonna die. Yes, we'll die one day. Sooner or later. but living in this world, people die earlier than supposed to because they have/are being cornered for being unable to "fit in".
Saying all these, I admit. I'm materialistic too. I'm vain and unsatisfied too. And if you think all my diet plans have failed, lemme tell you. You're wrong.
FYI - I lost weight during the hols after my Os.
IN YOUR FACE. This proves that my plans dont ALWAYS fail. Anyways, I really do want to lose weight, idk why but i just want to be like other people. And this is from pressure. Pressure the world gives me about how fat i am.
FYI - im not flabby. so I can't go under the fat category. I can be under the chubby category.
So before you jackasses have something to say, thing about how it feels if someone said it about you. Think about what word to use on that person because sometimes, your english is all over the place and you end up using the wrong words which proves how dumb you really are and makes people look down on you. Is there something so sinful and wrong about being fat? If it hurts your eyes so much, why dont you just go get yourself run down by a truck and die. So in that way, you neednt see anymore fat people.
But hopefully, you'll rot in hell.
