5 Things I've Learned About "The Real World" (So Far)

Now playin': The Rest of Us - Simple Plan

I've always wondered what it was about growing up that everyone seemed so frightened about that they would want to turn back time and be that little child who could just cuddle up against their parent when they've had a nightmare or when someone took their toy. I grew up wanting to grow up even faster and being in the "real world", living life as an ADULT with all the freedom I could ever want. But as I slowly got older each year, the excitement to be an adult met with fear... fear of taking on the responsibility to BE an adult. Plus, I really dreaded hitting the big "2" just because... 

I'm sure I'm not alone in this. 

So having turned 21, facing the world as an ADULT (meh), here are five of the many things that I've learnt about "The Real World" so far:


1. PRIORITIZING

Family? Money? Social life? Friends? Well... how 'bout SLEEP (OMG YES)?

I was lucky enough to have been on internship at the point I turned 21. Which was cool because... well, at least I stuck to my goal of at least pursuing what I've always wanted, even if it was just an internship - that's one foot in the door already. But with the nature of my work, I saw myself working and when I'm not working, I'm all worn out and just want to go home, watch a coupla episodes of FRIENDS and sleep. 

I was barely home for anything other than sleep. My friends barely saw me surface at dinner events. I replied people's texts like... 

Nearly never - think a week late). Smh.  

So when I turned 21, it was a weekday, I didn't tell anyone at work it was my birthday. I ended up working OT. I pretty much didn't expect ANYONE to celebrate my birthday. I mean, I was just missing in everything. People were bound to realise and get pissed, no? I was wrong, I had SEVEN mini-celebrations with family and friends! S E V E N. I was so touched! Despite everything, I kept getting mini surprises from everyone!

What I'm trying to say here is that priorities are important. I failed to see that I needed to balance out my life. I chose work and sleep over everything else. Sure, it was mainly because I really wanted to give whatever I got into work (trust me, everyone I knew were flabbergasted over how seriously I took my internship) and I had a lot to prove to not only everyone else but.. most importantly, myself. I NEEDED to reach everyone's expectations of me. 

Yeah, I know. I shouldn't feel like I should need to be what other people expect of me, but I just grew up being that way. End of. 

But in the end, I've learned to find some sort of balance and I'm still doing fine. Sure, being worn out is still very constant but at least, I know I've got some time spent with family and friends and.. S L E E P. 

OH GAWD YES. SLEEP. OH MOTHER OF ALL LEVELS OF REM SLEEP. 

Totes kidding. 

I get less than 5 hours of sleep every day. But I guess, there's some sort of sacrifice that's gotta be made at some point right? We can't always get the best of ALL the worlds. One needs to prioritize to be able to live life to the best that they can. 


2. CONTROL YOUR EMOTIONS BEFORE IT CONTROLS YOU

Being a member of the female species, this is one helluva task to deal with. The level of difficulty of managing your emotions greatly depends on the environment you're in and people you're surrounded by. I know it sounds extremely cliche but truth be told, this is one aspect of living life that can either make you, or break you. 

This is especially important now that we're living in the era where social media is so available as ranting platforms, we sometimes forget the reach of it and also, whatever gets on the internet, stays on it. 

I totally understand having a breakdown every now and then, heck! Even Britney Spears hit an all-time low with hitting the papz and shaving her head. Where did that lead her? Headlines and rehab. Now think of us as "commoners", if we can't manage our emotions, think of the repercussions - employers not confident in you to hire you, you lose the relationships you have worked so hard to get etc. You basically risk ending up losing nearly everything, all in the heat of the moment. 

In all honesty, I've really seen myself mellow down A LOT since after secondary school. Ask anyone who knows me since then, they'd tell you I used to be pretty hot-headed and unrelenting. I've been through a rough patch in Secondary School which taught me the importance of keeping my emotions in check. I am still guilty of ranting every now and then on Twitter, but I do so much less these days, keeping everything to a minimal. In fact, I will unbashfully say that I'm in wayyyyyy better control of my emotions now. 

Plus, I still believe firmly in repaying the kindness that one has shown towards me. This brings me to my next point...


3. KNOW WHO IS TRUE TO YOU

It's not a secret that we all are hypocrites (if you say you aren't, STOP LYING). I'm sure by now, everyone would know that the quality of friends or people around you definitely triumphs over the quantity of people, right? Well, not only is the quality of the people you surround yourself with, important, it is also important to remember the ones who were there when you were facing a difficult time, and those who kicked you when you were down and out. 

In a life where nearly everyone is putting up a facade, it's SO HARD to really spot who is sincere and really, from the bottom of their hearts, want to help and see you succeed in life. I gone through my fair share all sorts of people and to be frank, I still make the mistake of letting the fake ones get too close and thinking that they're the ones that are true to me. I guess there's really no fool-proof way to find out until the day you find yourself in dire situations - only then will you see who still stands firmly behind you, supporting you and not with a knife, just waiting to be lunged into your back as you fall. 

But if you're one of the lucky ones who have found some people aside from your family, who are true to you, I suggest you handcuff these people to you and throw the key to those cuffs into the sea. 

Okay maybe (and by this I mean PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD,) don't take that too literally. What I'm trying to put forth is that you need to keep this people close to you and let them know that you appreciate them. But but BUT, make sure that they do not misuse this trust and manipulate you into doing whatever they want. 

C'MON. PROTECT OURSELVES AT ALL TIMES!


4. MONEY IS NOT WATER

Well it might be a tad similar to water if your parents are some tycoons or something along the lines of you being born in extreme amounts of wealth. 

Being an adult ultimately means... bills. Meh. Lucky for me (and for most others who're brought up in a typical Asian environment), I'm still staying with my mom. So when I say "bills" I mean phone bills and well some other stuff. Basically, spending my own money on my own things. It sucks. I wished I was 40 and still getting allowance. 

DONT. JUDGE. ME. 

But seriously, as we get older, we see the importance of money, but at the same time, you find yourself spending it like.. it's not a big deal. I keep telling myself to save but... 30 minutes on online shops and I've spent more than half of what I earn as an intern................... 

Let's not forget just how expensive it is living in Singapore is! I spend half my pay on transportation. So when you think about it... I'm perpetually in the state of being broke. I learnt that it's wayyy cheaper to bring food to work (I rely embarrassingly heavily on my mother for this. Not because I can't cook, but because I can NEVER wake up on time to prepare my own coffee. :/) than to buy a meal. I learnt that I should never be left in a mall on my own for anything more then 15 minutes because I HAVE NO SELF-CONTROL. Thankfully for me, I don't drink or smoke. I shudder to think the levels of "broke" I would reach if I did. SMH. 

That moral of the story is that you learn that saving is a big deal. It gets much harder as you get older because you "need" to get this and that to match up with the standards of society/peers or to socialize or whatsnot. This goes back to No.1 - PRIORITIZING. What is the purpose of you saving? Do you really need to spend your money on this? Will you regret the purchase? 

Trust me, I am THE WORST when it comes to this.... I need to take my own advice at the mo. 


5. PUT EFFORT INTO SPRUCING UP YOUR CV

I honestly never thought much of my CV. I first did it when I was taking my Diploma and had to sit through some workshop that made us do it. I always thought it wasn't THAT important. But along the way (in University), I realised its importance - it is what will make a difference between a potential employer calling you and them calling another applicant instead. 

Over the past month, I've spent HOURS sprucing it up, proof-reading it and making sure that I'm doing it right. In all honesty, I don't know if it's as amazing as I hope it would be, but I pray to God it's good. Well, I would definitely employ me, or at least call me for an interview... then again, I might be bias (by this I mean I'm certain I'm being bias to myself. lol). 

You need to constantly keep it updated, to be relevant. I firmly believe that the amount of effort you put in into your CV can be seen when a potential employer sees it. To get a good job, or even stand a chance, this is the first step to have a foot in the door and getting called for an interview. With so many university students graduating every half a year, the amount of people who are better-suited and more qualified for the job you are applying to is endless! Pessimistically put, the odds will be constantly stacked against you, which is EXACTLY why you need to step up your game in order to stand out from all the other applicants. 

It's a tough world our there with very strong competitors. "When the going gets tough, the tough gets going." Be the tough one. Be the one who puts in all the effort. Show you aren't just another applicant, but one that goes the extra mile.